Yesterday I had my last TMS appointment. I was so proud of myself— I had 37 treatments in just a couple months and it feels like a huge accomplishment. I did a little dance in the lobby.
I’ve been reflecting on my TMS experience and I think the staff needs to be upfront with how long it can be to see results. I was told some people can feel a difference within a couple weeks, so that meant that everyday I didn’t feel it was working made me feel like I was failing or that it just wasn’t the right treatment for me. I had to keep telling myself to not give up and that tomorrow it may be different. The reality is that MOST patients do not notice the benefits until the tapering phase at the very end. It wasn’t until the 34th appointment that I thought it was making a positive difference.
Even though I had a rough couple of days this week, I know that overall my depression is getting easier to manage. I think the combination of doing TMS, therapy, removing my hormonal IUD, starting from scratch with my medications, and ketamine infusions have been a part of that success.
Medication update: I had to stop taking Viibryd (SSRI) because I was experiencing side effects like extreme swelling in my arms and legs along with a ‘pins and needles’ feeling.
Be well, be kind, take breaks.