Thank you to each and every person who donated so that I could get Ketamine infusions, which quite honestly have helped me stay alive. I have had 11 infusions total, most of them are helpful by getting me through to the next day, but I metabolize medicine very quickly so I often need a higher dose. We have had issues with the relief not lasting longer than 48 hours, but making it through each day is a BIG deal.
My infusion tonight was peaceful. I close my eyes while I listen to the ‘Guitar Chill’ playlist on apple music. I feel a little bit of hope, which is a dramatic change from last night.
I have more to share about TMS and other decisisions my doctors are wanting me to try, but right now I want to enjoy this peace, do some art journaling, and bask in this hope that I thought was forever gone.
This photo is very awkward because I was still under the influence, but I thought you’d like to see a picture of me that is not sobbing under blankets. Also, I need to clean my glasses–yikes!
We are keeping the Go Fund Me open so if you’d like to help out here is the link: https://gf.me/u/yssrpd
xo
i will grow from this 